Homecoming King

My little brother won Homecoming King.

We always knew he was the coolest of the bunch. Maybe it's because with so many older siblings, you're exposed to so much (whereas I was always among the naive of the class).  Maybe it's because mom let him buy all his own clothes, or he was just more daring and active than Anthony and I ever really were (eg, skipping class). As an older sibling, I want to be of some contribution to this: my smarts probably got passed on, my social skills spurred him on. But that only lasts so far until I have to admit that my little brother stands on his own. He has surpassed Anthony and I in every arena of high school life (except theatre...for now), and we really can't say we played a huge part in it. He's just that smart/talented/good-looking/social/(fill in the blank).

As a sister six years his senior, I think hard of my high school days. I think of the sliver of a thought I'd had of, What if I ever got nominated? I think of the flitting hopes I had: of wanting to be cool and put together without looking like I was trying, of staying at the top of the class while appearing like I didn't study, of the pride I had that I did, in fact, at least touch on various achievements in those four years of high school. My resume was packed and beautiful when I graduated, with breadth and depth. And I was proud of it, I knew I could stand out among applicants.

But I digress. Reflecting back, I know the words I heard of value and identity at that time could only sink so deep. I could only absorb so much at my maturity level, and it wasn't deep enough to reach the point where I could actually be honest about all those above and want to let it go. There's only so much you can understand at sixteen years. Six years later, it doesn't seem to matter so much anymore. Knowing I wasn't as mature and secure as I thought I was is okay, because I've since grown out of it. 

Yet as trivial as it seems, I feel as if I want my little brother have as much depth, insight, and value as possible at seventeen years of age. I like to think I've always made him think, challenged him to critical analysis. So whether or not it's true, I feel like my response to Alan's most recent accomplishment carries weight. Do I congratulate him on the crown? Does that validate his popularity, social status, success, and overshadow the deeper values I hope he develops? Though he has never aspired to win this, I want to take advantage of it.

Here are my thoughts:

Because homecoming at our high school centers around athletes, I want to commend him for what it takes to achieve as a runner: the hard work, perseverance, training, and dedication. I want him to know that these things are good and are life skills, that working through pain towards a goal will always be valuable.

Because the court is nominated by athletes amongst athletes, I want to commend him for being recognized as a leader by his peers. Maybe he was nominated because he is captain, but if so, he is captain because he stands for something. I want him to know that with leadership comes influence, and with influence comes change. And in the bigger picture, this is powerful and something to use well.

And because homecoming court is announced before the whole school, I want him to know that people are watching. Years later people may forget who you are, but for now, your name is floating around and that means something. Already you stand for something, and if I were a fly on the wall in the halls of your school, the conversation around your name would tell me what that was. Unfortunately, I'm not in your life enough to identify what that is. But I pray that now and in the future, you stand for the good, solid things in life, things like integrity and humility and a kind heart. There's always a gossip buzz about who's glad who won and he-deserved-it-more...but I pray that the buzz floating around your name is good, that people are happy you won. Not because you're a dashing young man (which you are), not because you're a diligent worker (which you are), but because there's something about you that people know is good and just. You know, your character.