Celebrating Life

It's your birthday week, D. And as much as both us say it's not a big deal and we don't really celebrate it, I think the truth is we both love it. We're pretty normal and predictable, but birthdays are an excellent excuse to pull surprise after surprise out of the box. To gaze at each other with eyes that know love and appreciation while trying not to give away the secret we have waiting.

The past two years have kept me from celebrating with you. First I was on an urban trek and completely out of communication, so I left a gift and a video recording with your roommate. Then I was on the intern trek and exploring the Grand Canyon on your birthday. I had snuck a card and some pictures into your car, then I called you while we were driving through Arizona with five other staff members singing their Happy Birthdays to you.

This year, I'm finally in town. And I've known since a year and a half ago that you've got me beat on birthday presents for life. When I turned 22, you had an album of photos and personal notes from friends ready. Not hastily put together, but planned, sincere, and heartfelt from students near and friends afar. Somehow even the contributions were more sincere than an average birthday scribble in a group card. You had contacted some of my friends who you've only met on occasion, you had students I had just met that very semester contribute. I cried and thought nothing could top that (I also don't tell anyone, but once in awhile I pull that album out before bed just to read the words).

Then last November, I returned from my first regional staff conference tired and grateful to unwind with you. It was a strange birthday, one raw with emotional fatigue after an intense few days, and the only celebratory event so far was buying a carton of strawberry ice cream with the staff team.  But somehow, you had arranged for a group of friends to sneak in with a gift that I think I'll always remember. You and Harrison  had managed to pull together more than enough cash to replace my dying laptop. I remember both feeling speechless but also being unable to stop chattering in surprise. I remember my hands were too shaky to open the box, and my brain couldn't seem to function enough to find the charger or the power button. I ran my hands over the new keys (no letters were worn off), exclaimed that I could now Skype others (finally, a webcam), laughed that their was a number keypad (yes, I've missed it). I thought about all the productive nights stalled by a frozen computer, of the times I rolled my eyes in staff meetings as I waited for the screen to catch up with my scrolling. I thought about the projects I've put on hold: photo edits, videos, websites--simply because my old laptop could never handle it.

But I digress. This is about you. You and how you make the excuse that those past two years don't count, because those gifts were from friends. You downplay the fact that it was your idea and you coordinated it, but I also know how proud you were to see me so happy.

I'll never beat those birthdays. And this year, your surprise was a small birthday dinner when you thought it was a date night (sound familiar?) with nothing fancy at all. Oh yeah, that and a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts. We say that we love birthdays because it's an excuse to love the other person especially well, to do things they know they'll love, to let them know just how special they are.

But as it turned midnight on your birthday and I played a cheesy birthday song on youtube while dancing around in circles, there was something else. This year, I was so excited for your birthday because it wasn't just about doing things for you. It was about celebrating you. Your life and how grateful I am for it. An amazing, beautiful life that's hand-crafted by a God who...well, had the best ideas ever when it came to you. I ask you a weird question sometimes: Are you real? It's such a strange question and it usually leads to funny expressions and solid laughter, but it captures my disbelief that sometimes, you are really too good to be true. The things you love, the way you live, what you know about me, how you treat others, and the infinite values, interests, and habits that run around in the backstage of your life.

Okay, so this totally isn't on your birthday-birthday, but it has candles so it's close enough!

But you are real, and this week, we celebrate two dozen years of life and pray for many more.

Happy Birthday, my favorite.